John's Quavering Pencil

I have been feeling in rather a blue mood lately and yesterday I wondered whether I have been getting enough exercise. I even began to suspect that I might have a deficiency of daylight hours, shutting myself up so much in my windowless studio. Today I therefore determined to go for a walk on the beach. I was lucky enough to catch a beautiful sunny morning for my seaside adventure.

Sunny Whitburn beach

I was mildly perturbed to discover a couple of large paw marks, firmly imprinted in the sand. My thoughts immediately turned to the Hound of the Baskervilles, and I swear I heard the most blood-curdling howl, on the wind.

Foreboding paw marks in the sand

As you can see, my anxiety was well well-founded, since the huge black beast pounded towards me at an alarming rate.

The Hound of the Baskervilles

I was knocked to the ground by a glancing blow to my solar plexus as it rushed past me in pursuit of a white, gallivanting poodle. My head hit the ground and the sun appeared to be temporarily switched off.

The moment the sun was switched off

By the time I regained consciousness, light had returned to normal but I appeared to be lying in a drift of sea coal dust. Was I about to fall down a disused mineshaft, perhaps obsolete since the Victorian era, unknown and now uncovered by the pounding waves? I asked myself this question, rhetorically.

The black sea coal dust

I had no idea where I was. I staggered up the beach. Somebody had obviously anticipated my difficulty, and had conveniently put up a sign saying “You are here”. I suddenly realised that they had even drawn the points of the compass so that I could orient myself to the real world.

You are here!

I remembered being here early in the morning, with the sun coming up strong and low over the horizon. And in England, the sun rises in the East. I turned to the sea, raised my arms up from my sides, scarecrow-wise, and desperately tried to remember which was my left and which was my right. Then I recalled that I wore my watch on my left hand. I turned my head and took sight along the length of my right arm and with confidence stepped South. At the lighthouse I swung West and within a couple of blocks I had found my car. And here I am, my dear blogophiles. Talk to you later.

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